Swipe, swipe, swipe – nothing. Phil was beginning to think this year was going to be a repeat of the last – about as romantically enticing as a candlelit dinner at the Shack. But just as that despair was setting in, there was a vibration and a chime that he hadn’t heard in a while. A match. Is this for real? He burst onto the app in seconds. There she was, Selena.
'On here ‘cause my friends made me do it. Wanderlust. Wine-o-clock, around the clock. Foodie. 420. Tongue emoji. Kiss emoji. Star emoji.'
Classic. But the biggest question was what was he going to open with? A quick Google of ‘best pickup lines 2018’ and he was ready to go.
“Hey, are you my appendix? Because I don’t understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.”
And so the wait began.
Another notification, another match and another pick up line. Welcome to a day in the life of Selena. Her search for ‘the one’ wasn’t really panning out the way she wanted.
Like any other day she was swiping away without much to catch her attention, but then she saw him - Cosmo. Amidst all the gym selfies and lackluster bios, he emerged like a shining unicorn, if unicorns could drive. That hairstyle, that smile and that car. Oh, that car.
Selena’s weakness has always been a man in a reasonably priced sedan, and Cosmo’s ’91 Corolla was doing it for her. He looked like he was ready to do all the things, and Selena wanted in.
Cosmo is your regular man about town. From Kloof to Claremont, he’s everywhere. You could still find him at Clarke’s knocking back a cold one on First Thursday, even if the wind was threatening the integrity of his hairdo.
But today he wasn’t everywhere. He had one destination in mind. Flying down the street with a bottle of wine and a bag of treats, he was going to make his valentine’s day.
So unlucky for Phil, he didn’t make the bill. And unlucky for Selena, she’ll remain a dreamer. ‘Cause our man Cosmo has his eye on only one girl, and he’s on a mission to make her feel like one in a million.
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If your plants are as thirsty as these three, then give our water wise article a read. It's important to keep your plants hydrated while being as water conscious as possible in these coming months.